The Good Wife Puts Kalinda On The Spot In The Hunt For Bitcoin’s Creator

Not going to lie internet, I’ve only heard of Bitcoin a few times and I’m not a fan. Despite being a relatively adept internet operator I avoid “fake money” concepts like the plague. Bitcoin, World of Warcraft gold and “Linden Dollars*” make me suspicious when people attempt to use them instead of real money.

They’re not regulated and transactions are completely transparent and they maintain no legitimacy whatsoever outside of the few million people in the world that use them. Just no thanks man. I’d rather be an old fuddy duddy then attempt to use virtual Monopoly money and hope it gets real in the next ten years. Also Whataburger doesn’t accept them. If I can’t buy a delicious cheeseburger with these coins then what, may I ask, is the point?

Sadly The Good Wife doesn’t tackle the long-term potential of Bitcoin in last night’s episode. Instead they questioned the nature of it (is it a commodity or currency) for a few minutes and spent the rest of the episode wrapping us up in a con game created by the fictional creator of the system.

One of these "Hollywood" nerds is the creator. In real life they wouldn't look this good.

And I’m not complaining. The mystery of who created it is much more fascinating than its existence. In the real world its creation is attributed to “Satoshi Nakamoto” who may or may not exist. On The Good Wife the creator doesn’t even get a name they are simply “Mr. Bitcoin” and later “Ms. Bitcoin” and then later “Mr.Bitcoin” again.

The three chief suspects exist as a life-sized shell game, the true identity of the creator lurking in one of their computers. While Alicia is tasked with keeping one of the suspects out of jail it falls on Kalinda to sort the shell game out.

Which isn’t as easy as it would normally be because the suspects are nearly all very gifted cryptographers capable of building giant puzzles that will keep people running in circles. Unless that person is Kalinda Sherma and she’s got a lot going on in her personal life and doesn’t have time for games.

Show me your badges boys…

Sure half the episode is about her hunting for the real Ms./Mr. Bitcoin, but the rest of the episode is about her involvement with Will’s lawsuit.

See Mrs. Scott-Carr is ready to destroy Will Gardener because she really hates his absolutely awesome smoothie drinking lawyer.

Also because Will probably broke the law.

She’s so ready that she sicks the State’s Attorney’s office’s Kalinda 2.0 on Kalinda.

Ladies, breathy voices and long looks do not a relationship make. Otherwise Rizzoli and Isles would be married with children.

The ladies trade flirtations in hushed tones and then Kalinda 2.0–known as Dana to the world at large–throws down the gauntlet. How? Did she tell Kalinda she knew things about her? Or threaten her place in the firm? Oh no. She went after the one weak spot Kalinda has. Alicia.

Because that forged document from last week that Alicia realized was forged but was told to forget? The SA office hasn’t forgotten it and will gladly see her disbarred if it means they can get a rise out of Kalinda or Will.

When faced with loyalty to Will or loyalty to Alicia it is no contest. By the end of the episode it looks like Kalinda reluctantly throws Will under the bus so she can protect Alicia.

I just…God bless this show and putting a relationship between two women like Alicia and Kalinda at the forefront. By this point in their relationship it is no longer guilt that drives Kalinda to look after Alicia. She just genuinely likes her–more than even the man who cuts Kalinda’s paychecks. These two aren’t friends in the sense that they vacation together or get drinks. At most they probably sit in silence in conference rooms eating especially crunch salads, but Kalinda feels an overwhelming need to protect Alicia. To see her safe and sound and protected from the dark environs they all inhabit.

I only hope that at some point this season we’ll see the affection reciprocated because otherwise the show becomes less about the Good Wife overcoming scandal and crafting a new life and it becomes more about her being a particularly strong-willed damsel in distress always in need of a Kalinda or Will or Peter to save her. Which is decidedly less interesting.

Notes

• Looks like Alicia’s son plans on playing her against his grandmother to get what he wants. Clever kid. That’s how I got a car when I was in college.
• No Alan Cumming this week. Normally I’d be sad but the A story of the Bitcoin shell game was too much fun.
• Bob Balaban as a Treasury attorney is one of the best additions to the Good Wife universe this year.
• That was Jason Biggs as one of the Bitcoin creator suspects. Nice to see he’s still getting work I guess. Better than boning a pie.
• NEXT WEEK: Alicia has to admit to banging Will. Under oath.

*Linden Dollars? Really? Second Life and it’s game currency may get a lot of press but has anyone ever actually MET someone who plays it? Do they even exist outside of  stories in Wired?