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  • Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes – Divorcing!

    1 Comment »Cake & IcingJun 29, 2012

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    News of Tom and Katie’s divorce breaks in the FemPop cyber- headquarters:

    Rebecca Jane: TOM CRUISE! ALEX! TOM CRUISE! ALEX! TOM CRUISE! ALEEEX! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
    Alex: ….whaaat?
    Rebecca Jane: He’s DEAD. Kidding. He’s getting a divorce!
    Alex: I just nearly died. Also good – now he will come out.
    Rebecca Jane: Ha ha ha. I can’t believe I did that to you! Oh man. That was pretty funny.
    Alex: Is it wrong that I still deeply enjoy his films? Like whatever one that just came out? I can’t remember it, but I know I liked it.
    Rebecca Jane: The anus singing.
    Alex: Was it a comedy?
    Rebecca Jane: The anus
    Alex: I honestly cannot remember, Becca -
    Rebecca Jane: You liked it, he was a rock star – that one -
    Alex:  Oh right! Now you saying I like anus makes sense, because for a second I was confused
    Rebecca Jane: Remember how Tom Cruise was married to Mimi Rogers?!
    Alex: Man. In my head they did a threesome with David Duchovny.
    Rebecca Jane: …..
    Alex: IT MAKES SENSE
    Rebecca Jane: Did you make an audio recording about this theory?*
    Alex: She was leaving Cruise at the same time she starred in a movie with Duchovny and he loved working with her and was later like BE ON X-FILES and she was.
    Rebecca Jane: Plus he’s a sex addict.
    Alex: Right. Also she ushered Cruise into Scientology while also being older than him. She is basically to blame for everything wrong in Hollywood.
    …
    I just really hate her character on X-Files.
    Rebecca Jane: Man. What’s she up to now?
    Alex: I don’t know waving her wooden tatas around not being a good actor?

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  • TheBestofAlexandra

    Word. All of that is so spot on. I also hated her on the X-Files, and I am now a Threesome Conspiracy Theorist.

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