I grew up with a second-wave feminist. My mother brooked no sexist fools. When I confessed I loved The Jetsons she huffed and told me it was sexist drivel. My siblings and I could define patriarchy before we were twelve and we knew all to well how virulent sexism was. In sixth grade I nearly stopped talking to my best friend because she was pro-life. I’ve always been a feminist. I’ve always identified as one. To me the word is as innocuous as any other polite descriptor. When I launched FemPop in March 2011 the tagline for the website was “Pop Culture Through A Feminist Lens.” It was accurate and snappy and emblazoned at the top of the site and on all related social media forums. Almost immediately people noticed the phrase. Particularly guy friends and relations. “It makes me uncomfortable,” was the usual line. “It just doesn’t jibe with the material,” was more specific. “Your site is for everyone. Feminism isn’t.” Feminism was, to these people, a moniker used by angry hairy-pitted activists who hated men, loved women too much, were physically incapable of humor and probably didn’t wear a bra.* It was a word intoned by activists. Not “real” people. I can only guess they still talked to me because I “wasn’t like a normal feminist” or something. It must have been all the dead rape baby jokes I used to tell in high school.** Frustrated I went and whipped up a Tumblr, “You Might Be A Feminist.” It was a way of defining what feminism meant to me and other women and it was a very quick success, if moderate, success. But only with people already identifying themselves as feminists. It wasn’t changing anyone’s way of thinking or converting the Katy Perrys, Carla Bruni Sarkozys and Rooney Maras of the world. The people who NEEDED to see it weren’t. It started to feel a little masturbatory. In February 2012, after yet another explanation from a well-meaning friend that the word was alienating to FemPop’s audience I snapped. I abruptly changed the logo and removed the word “feminism” from its prominent position on the website. I told myself it was an experiment I could later write about. I briefly even deluded myself into believing nothing would change. Except there was a change, and it was so immediate and immense I actually thought I’d broken something on the website in my minor bit of rebranding. That’s the bounce rate for FemPop immediately preceding and succeeding the change. For those of you not in the SEO know the bounce rate charters the percentage of people who enter a site and then “bounce” away. If a person comes to your site, looks at one page and promptly leaves that’s a “bounce.” A high bounce rate means more people doing this and vice versa. I changed one word and suddenly visitors felt comfortable poking around. Nothing else changed on the site. There wasn’t a huge redesign and the clearly feminist title of the site didn’t change. I didn’t alter color schemes or suddenly post the best article in the history of the universe. It was still pop culture through a feminist lens–but with a little less feminism on the front page. It disturbed me that my friends and family had been so correct. I set the knowledge aside a little too scared to write about it. Because there are implications. Feminism is a dirty word with the mainstream and that’s a little terrifying to me. Back in March at SXSW I was speaking with some older lady volunteers. I’d grown accustomed, at that point, to having to be careful with how I explained FemPop to people. Have you ever gone to E3 (a video game expo) and introduced yourself as working for a feminist entertainment website? The look on the PR reps faces is not a pleasant one! When these ladies saw the name of the outlet I was representing I saw their eyebrows rise. I braced myself for yet another “oh you’re one of those” moments I often have at industry events. Instead they politely asked me if my site was related to feminism. I said yes, because even post-rebranding I wasn’t going to hide the purpose of the site. They were delighted! We chatted and I confessed to them the entirety of the “feminism” experiment. “Well,” one said with the sage wisdom of a native Austinite in her 60s, “whatever you got to do to get them to listen right?” I don’t like to be sneaky. I shouldn’t have to cringe when I declare myself a feminist in mixed company like I’ve just outed myself as a Democrat in Texas. In a perfect world I wouldn’t. But ours is an imperfect one where the word “feminist” has become positively toxic. When you have well-educated women refusing to label themselves as feminist there’s a problem. When Tumblr is full of people (not just men’s rights activists!) who call themselves “equalists” instead you have a problem. Katy Perry had a perfect platform when accepting her Billboard Woman of the Year Award. She could have legitimized feminism in a very radical way. She did the exact opposite. She’s the woman of the year, believes in equality, but is definitely not a feminist guys. Part of that’s on her, and I get irritated just thinking about her refusal to use the label. But by rejecting the label she’s pointed out that there’s something wrong with it. Feminism isn’t evil or dead or the exclusive purview of the (white) activist, but the word is. *I was an awful person in high school. It isn’t even up for debate. Erin Treat Well, that’s disturbing, but I guess not surprising. You have to do what you think is best, but personally, I will never stop using the word and I refuse to allow the Right to control how I speak. If I end up making some poor delicate souls uncomfortable so be it. The First Joe Good for you. I’d much rather people with noxious beliefs, like feminism, were loud and proud about them. Then we know who they are and can choose not to associate with them. Freedom of association – it’s a wonderful thing. Alex Cranz Pst First Joe, your misogyny is showing. Tracheal It’s not the Right controlling how you speak…it’s more like you trying to control how everyone else speaks. That said, anyone with more than one brain cell, knows why feminism is so cringe-WORTHY. Nice to see such immediate and negative bounces. Bodes well for the future of civilization. Jim I agree with the change. There’s nothing wrong with feminism (the word or the movement), it’s just that over time the word has gained a negative connotation. Sometimes that just happens to our words, and try as we might, we can’t always “win” them back, as our language and the use of it is continually evolving. Tracheal That’s for sure. This one won’t be ‘won’ back because it’s DOA. The negative connotation was earned exactly the same way all fascists/totalitarian hate movements have always earned notoriety. Alex Cranz Hm…maybe calling feminists fascists isn’t such a hot idea. Just a thought. scott mclelland for many groups of them its been a self given title , the group who defaced the mens rghts are human rghts posters in canada with the woman since dubbed “creepybittergirl” called themselves femifacists .. these facists were male and female feminists , wasnt anything to do with there gender, just there ideology that meant they desired to shut up anyone who thought differently to them . UncleElmer A wise parent teaches their child to think for themselves while presenting their view on the world. The author’s mother inflicted a serious delusion on her by proclaiming “sexism” in everything, much as some parents school their children to see “racism” in all of life’s disappointments. This is a self-defeating attitude that colors their decisions and perspective, inevitably leading to disillusion and bitterness. Alex has learned by experience the toxic connotations of the owrd “feminism; likely she will gradually turn away from that poisonous pedagogy and become an outspoken proponent for men’s rights. Alex Cranz Did you miss the part where I talk about always being a feminist but about how only the word is toxic. Please RTFA. UncleElmer RTFA means Read The Feminist Article? scott mclelland Im going to offer a challenge on that , and i am going to do it in as respectful a way as i can , I am not a feminist , I cannot stand MODERN feminsim as it is so far removed from the ideals that the movement was founded on , i put it to you that feminism has become so complacent in its belief that it is right , that it is beyond reproach and the fact that simply speaking a challenge against it means you are labelled a mysoginist no matter how truthful your words may be that its not just the title that has become stale , but for many its simply a tool to gain leverage irrespective of the validity of the situation. I lost respect for it when i read the stern report in the uk on rape and the fact that feminist groups used the figure 8% as the number of rapists convicted, now this came from a method that is not used in any other crime called the attrition rate.. The actual figure is closer to 60% the same as most violent crime , now that stunned me , and what horrified me was the fact that groups supposedly fighting for women by there actions were putting them off getting help simply because it allowed them to get more money to tackle a problem that they were already winning ……….. modern feminism has thrown not just men , but in many cases women under the bus to get and keep influence and money . Im going to use an animal farm quote here and modify it slightly but its apt ….. in modern feminisim everyone is equal , but some are more equal than others. Zephirus A rather odd inference to make. The word is the problem? Alright, what conclusion does that lead us to? The word could only possibly be a “problem” if: A) It was been unfairly and systematically maligned for so long that it has become a negative in the minds of people: The grand conspiracy/patriarchy argument, take your pick (<— this one I think the majority who frequent here will latch on to). B) The actions of feminists put people off; it is silly to judge a movement by mere words. The actions provide the best compass: The "feminists are evil" argument. C) People are naturally not inclined towards the arguments of feminism and they cause visceral negative reactions that nevertheless remain unspoken for fear of being maligned as a bigot: The human biodiversity/sexual dimorphism argument. Or that is what I can come up with at least, perhaps someone else could come up with a scenario that maintains feminism in a positive light and doesn't sound crazy either. The First Joe The answer is “B”. Actions, not words, are most important. Alex Cranz Your passionate hatred of feminism and women amuses me. scott mclelland Alex … hatred of an ideology doesnt mean hatred of a gender .. if you apply that standard to it then you are basically saying that to be a feminist you have to be a woman which in itself is the sort of thing that makes non feminists like your male friends uncomfortable being in feminist spaces, and it is a slap in the face to all male feminists . Alex Cranz You’re adorable with your misogyny. Maybe take it where I don’t have to catch a whiff of it’s stench? K? Thanks. The First Joe Well, I think you should put “Feminist” back in your title. You’re misleading your readers by omission otherwise. People should know you’re a feminist, with a feminist aganda up front, so they can chose to “bounce”. It’s dishonest to leave it out, in the same way that the American Eugenics Society dishonestly renamed itself the innocuous sounding “The Society for the Study of Social Biology.” in 1972. Katy Perry is right by the way – seeking equality does not require feminism, in fact: feminism is directly opposed to equality. We know this, because we’ve seen what feminists have done over the last 100years plus*, and we judge feminists by their deeds not their words. So, have the courage of your convictions: Reinstate “Feminist” back in the title of your site, and then people of good conscience can judge you by the history of the movement you subscribe to, and forewarned – choose to avoid you if they wish. *E.g.s: – The White Feather feminism of the UK suffragettes, who colluded with an exploitative upper class to shame hundreds of thousands of young, mostly working class men (the vast majority of whom did not have the vote either!) to go and fight and die in the trenches in WWI. After this successful “patriotic” operation the suffragettes were rewarded with the vote and their leader got a seat in Parliament. ( Emmeline and Christabel Pankhurst led the White Feather “brigade”, we know this from theirs and Sylvia’s diaries / letters. Sylvia and Adela to their credit, took no part in this and opposed the war). – Reproductive rights (abortion / adoption) for women, none for men. – Men having to pay child support for kids not theirs. – Legal obstacles preventing men from getting DNA paternity tests / disallowing those tests in court / giving the mother veto. – Presumed mother custody. – Bias in secret family court. – Efforts to repress stats on domestic violence inflicted by women on men (now overcome here in the UK, with men victims at last getting official acknowledgment as 40% of the victims of DV – Home Office stats)… Alex Cranz Ha ha ha. Oh you poor man. It must be so hard to find ways you’re discriminated against. Alex Cranz Ha ha ha. Wait. The UK’s death count in WW1 is all the Pankhurst sisters’ fault? Hilarious! So nice to now be informed. Go back to your MRA cave please. The First Joe Oh, look censorship! By feminists! What a HUUUUUUGE surprise! *slowhandclap* I bet you delete this too. Congratulations on proving my point. The First Joe Oh wait. My bad. Some browser SNAFU. Alex Cranz If I could like this comment more I would. Anthony Zarat Why should people feel “comfortable”” with a movement that supports discrimination, hatred, and sexism? If you think feminism has ANYTHING to do with equality, you are seriously deluded. Alex Cranz If you think anyone outside of your MRA forum believes in misandry or MRA you’re the deluded one. JH Quite a lot of modern feminists proudly proclaim themselves man-haters these days; it’s the cool thing to do. Which, I guess it’s good they’re being honest. They can date each other, and leave the men to us. Velma Those are not real feminists, JH. scott mclelland Alex … if you dont belive hatred of men exists … then what do you think people like the femitheist who regularly associates with sites like the radfemhub and posts about killing men , “castration day” and the likes , or mary daly who wanted to reduce the number of men to just 10 percent of the worlds population , or the scum manfesto which has become so mainstream its shown at schools in sweden and used in some goverment literature. ??. Hatred of men because they are men is something that occurs and is valid in the same way as hating a woman is valid , you cannot say that one doesnt exist or that the other is more valid because once you do you remove yourself from any pretence that you stand for equality . beckyn You’ve got an * and an ** in the text, but only the one * footnote (which seems to relate to the ** text). I was looking forward to the footnote for * . Anthony Zarat You want to know why people reject feminism? Because feminists support discrimination, sexism, and hate. I will give you one example, out of thousands, where feminists have used their colossal power to support discrimination: Obamacare contains dozens of women only provisions (the word “women” appears 134 times, compared to two occurences of the word “men”). Every instance of discrimination against men is serious … but the most problematic are the seven offices of women’s health that oversee the USPSTF (the USPSTF decides who gets health coverage and who does not). How do the feminists react to the massive discrimination against men in health care? See for yourself: http://jezebel.com/5922194/mens-rights-activists-upset-the-word-men-isnt-used-more-in-affordable-care-act Rebecca Jane Stokes Uh Jezebel was presenting that with an ironic bent, FYI. Don’t worry, I’m sure there are plenty of other sites that will support you argument with the respect it deserves. scott mclelland rebecca ……. jezebel presented a wonderful article entitled “have you hit your boyfriend cuz uh we have” where they celebrated domestic violence including a rather disturbing comment where one hit a crying boyfriend because he thought he had cancer, and they found this funny …. its a woeful sight to claim has any morality . Alex Cranz Ha ha ha ha. Oh man. I’m dying. You’re the best. How’s that fedora treating you? Vintango This is depressing but it’s sadly not surprising. I see this type of thinking all the time in comments, and often the people angriest about feminism clearly have no idea what they’re even angry about. It’s now such a loaded word that even people who agree with the principles of the movement are afraid to use it, and that’s truly unfortunate. Any site that dares approach the subject or use the dreaded word will subject itself to a small army of angry, flustered men who are just appalled that women would dare ask for things like equal pay or paid maternity leave (“Why don’t MEN get time off when they have a baby, HMM?!?”). I think a big part of this is the inability to comprehend that “equality for women” means “equality” and not “superiority”. Nothing will convince some men otherwise, but in the meantime it’s important to keep having conversations like this. Alex Cranz These guys in the comments are cracking me up. I’d be irritated with them, but they’re so scared and fragile that I’d much rather put them in a box and up on a shelf far away from the scary world where women are equal and dare demand equality. TJ I was with you during your entire article, and then I read some of your comments/responses and you basically further damage the word ‘feminist’ on your own site…like this comment placed squarely under a man who has admitted to being raped by one of his mother’s friends when he was younger, and also abused emotionally by his mother…no compassion on your part, just sick amusement at a man who suffered at the hands of his mother…no you’re not a feminist…you’re a monster. I’m happy Scott seems to have found peace with his past, and I wish him all the best in the future. Melle I completely second this. Yes, he says some problematic things, but be patient and kind, and explain why you have issues with what he said. You’ll change a lot more people with discussion than you will with vitriolic complaints. northernTNT Because males constantly bring it down to the “me” point of view, instead of the big picture. Female rights in society and rights to non-violence is not about individual “woe me” stories, but about the overwhelming statistics that unite us. scott mclelland I grew up with a feminist mother, i can actually tell you what it feels like to be beaten with a copy of the scum manifesto , to be told im worthless simply because i was born male , to be told that my sexual abuse at the hands of one of her friends was my fault and i hurt her friendship ……. i could go on and there is a lot , lot more to my story than just that , do i hate women nah what i want to see is a place and a time where everyone is viewed as equal , where men being abused isnt dismissed because ” more women are abused” , where slicing the clitoris for religious reasons and slicing of the foreskin for religious reasons are viewed with equal disgust , where men can ( and the university of toronto really damaged feminisim this past month on this ) can talk about what hurts them without being abused, threatened and spat on by women because we want a voice.There is a great woman, Erin Pizzey who opened the worlds first domestic violence shelter she wrote a book about it “prone to violence” which talked about her run ins, her death threats at the hands of feminists and killing her dog ……. not all feminists are like that far from it , the loudest and most vocal have made it the way its percived, its a toxic brand. A good example of what you “real feminists” need to do was found in scotland a few years back when the terrorist attack on the airport by islamic terrorists occured, the moderate decent muslims came out and reclaimed islam , they marched and loudly stated that the nuts , the hate filled ones do not speak for them , and unsurprisingly we here in scotland dont have an issue with islam which cant be said in other countries where its followers didnt try and differentiate themselves from those who poisoned the original tennants of there religion , maybe if feminists were out there challenging the loud abusive feminist poison then it would be viewed differently …………. oh wait , warren farrell former board member of NOW in new york , a dr who spent decades campaigning for womens rights and is one of the most liberal men i have ever heard speak did try and speak out against them , and well……. he has been slanderd, lied about and in general been viewed as scum . An honest challenge would be to every feminist , same as i have to do living in scotland and being a male survivor of rape by a woman and someone who is bi polar …. in the same way i have to challenge abuse and misconceptions maybe if feminists challenged there own instead of just expecting everyone to know they are different things would be different . JH I’m a woman myself and I admit to being one of those who shies away from feminism—but it has nothing to do with the word itself. It has everything to do with what self-professed feminists actually say and do. Bullshit like Shroedinger’s Rapist, denying that men can be sexually assaulted–and by women, even, gasp! (or that when they are their assualts don’t matter because more women are assaulted yearly, and don’t even get me started on prison!)–advocating for the removal of any type of prison sentencing for women whatsoever regardless the crime, being proud of misandry—it’s things like that that put me (and I suspect, millions like me) off from the idea of feminism. Equality is one thing. Superiority is entirely another. EvilMonkeyPope Let us never forget that Feminists had men legally declared subhuman to deprive them of voting rights yet tax them double, restricted access to condoms & vasectomies, announced that Gays just needed to try cunniligus to straighten out, denied justice to all men who were raped because “they were asking for it,” annexed peaceful neighboring countries, and permanently shipped all dissenters off to gulags. PaulMurrayCbr The word “feminism” means men are not welcome. The word “feminism” means “lawsuit”. You see that word on a website, and straight away images of the sherifs pounding on your door, dragging yo away for “harassment” or “stalking” or plain old “rape” (to a feminists, everything a man does is ‘rape’, almost by definition). That one word – yes indeed – makes a hell of a lot of difference. Rebecca Jane Stokes This doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. I’m a feminist. When I call myself one, all I mean is that I should have the same rights as a dude. You know, stuff like being able to make decisions about my own body, being paid the same amount as a guy, etc. I think men are mostly great, just like I think women are mostly great. I don’t understand where a lot of the ire on this article is coming from, to be honest. MsJack I think that, to some extent, feminism *is* the problem—or rather, that modern-day feminism has chosen all of the wrong hills to die on. For example, from your article: “In sixth grade I nearly stopped talking to my best friend because she was pro-life.” Really? So you also would have stopped being friends with Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Susan B. Anthony? I know, I know: classic feminism was pro-life, and gradually it shifted to pro-choice. But what’s wrong with pro-life feminism, especially when it worked out so well for our foremothers? Why did your friend’s pro-life position ever cause you to even think about disowning her? Abortion is a subject that we all feel pretty strongly about. There are really good reasons for being pro-life and there are really good reasons for being pro-choice. But instead of acknowledging that and welcoming pro-life women who care about women’s rights and well-being and want to join hands on other causes that we could all agree on, modern-day feminism has pretty much made it an anathema to be pro-life. If you’re pro-life, you hate women, the end. As another example, I remember I clicked on your “you might be a feminist if…” Tumblr, got to something to the effect of “You might be a feminist if you vote Democrat,” and clicked away in disgust. The party that ran a presidential campaign ad comparing women’s participation in voting to having sex is feminist? News to me. I watched in amazement this past election as some of my feminist friends began talking about how reporters ought to be asking Mitt Romney about how his church treats women. Funny, I’m pretty sure they never wanted reporters to ask Bill Clinton, Al Gore, John Kerry, or Joe Biden about how their churches treat women… Did the Southern Baptist Convention or Roman Catholic church start ordaining women and not tell me about it? Again, news to me. And that’s really the problem. Modern-day feminism has wedded itself to a host of politically liberal agendas and trends that a lot of people are going to disagree with instead of focusing single-mindedly on agitating for women’s rights and well-being, which almost everyone would probably agree with if you sat them down and got them to think about it. It shouldn’t be alienating people who care about women’s well-being but don’t support its pet political goals, but it does. Worse, when feminists’ favored political party engages in sexism or misogyny, they quietly look the other way or even defend it. Hence the word “feminist” has taken on considerable stigma, and I’m sorry to say, deservedly so. PS — People calling themselves “equalists” are idiots. The word they’re looking for is “egalitarian.” scott mclelland MsJack , spot on in every single way, modern feminism isnt real feminism and its modern feminism that has tarnished the good work of the past , hence the backlash that is growing now , what as an egalitarian worries me the most just now is that unless everyone gets round the table then the pendulum will swing to far in the opposite direction again . Cam Dear Alex, I love the website. It is funny and clever and makes me want to be like you guys when I grow up. The experiment you launched completely went over my head, because I began to read the articles when that big rude word was over there on the banner. Reading what is going on in the comments, I feel immensely tired, like when someone says something super oafish at a business function, and I can just feel myself giving up on Ranting for Justice. Or even on Slyly Snarking for Justice. Thank you for being so good to us, the silent, pop culture loving feminists who chortle at your Good Wife recaps. Maybe next time, I will get the energy to build an actual beautiful zinger to ignorance and stupidity. Cheers, Cam. DeNihilist Katy Perry? She will not claim to be feminist? So she must be (re)educated? Interesting…. So does she not have the right to express her viewpoint? Interesting… By the way, no one can be equal. Impossible. We can only have the equal right to be our own unique selves. Ivan Ah! I heard about you before! Are you like a female version of GMP? Doesn’t look like ‘sisters’ approve and normal women are not buying it either. Without a shred of sarcasm I am truly sorry for that. The title is beautiful! “Yes I hear voices in my head and everyone else should as well.” Keep it up the men hate! KW Feminism isn’t necessarily the problem. After all it is just a word, it is what that word means that is the problem: Female Supremacist bigot. That is what a real feminist is and what feminism is all about. After enduring the sheer level of misandry(hatred of males) that feminists have spent a better part of a lifetime of cultivating in order to intentionally disenfranchise boy’s young men and men, there is no room for forgiveness aside the forgiveness found for a criminal sentenced to life in jail. And that is what all you female supremacists are: Criminals. Only a person who thinks less of women because of their gender could call what feminists have done to Gen Y males as “harmless”. You feminists directly and in-directly intentionally worked to create an educational system that was outright hostile towards us and a society that is totally indifferent to the plight of males. If a little boy is raped by a woman he is told he “got lucky”; If a young man loses his job and becomes homeless he is just an unlucky “persons”(yet feminists foam at the mouth at the plight of homeless women even though men make p the vast majority of homeless people). If evidence is found that male managers give raises to female employees less often you demand the male manager be crucified, if female managers are found to en mass discriminate against male employees in raises you view it is “progress”. Heck the gender gap in college that spawned Title IX is much larger, just that it is now young women who attend college more often. The Feminist answer: Awesome, girls are born smarter and we must do more! DO more what? make sure every college is a womens only club? Does seem to fit with all the women only clubs in America, Europe and women only trains and taxi’s abroad. I wouldn’t be surprised if I went to the mall and seen the best placed water fountains labeled “women only”. Feminism is nothing but a putrid hate movement, and those that defend it or are a part of it are nothing more then a bunch of disgusting bigots. I will tell you the number one mistake you female supremacists make: You assume that men are some monolithic being that has always existed, and shared a form of collective memory and conscious. Well we haven’t, and us Gen Y guy’s life experience is that we have faced nothing but persecution, oppressment, unequal access to employment and education, unequal wages(Women in Gen Y tend to make a $1.25 more, something you feminists like to view as another sign of “progress”). Combined with the blatant discrimination in the courts, government funding for scholarships, work programs, promotions(unless your born into a well to do family, if your male, particularly Caucasian male, you have zero career advancement whatsoever. You run into both the glass ceiling and the glass floor). Don’t assume that us younger guy’s have the same writ of grievances against society and the female supremacist hate movement known as feminism. The only thing we share is that fact that we both really don’t like misandry, and that we really don’t like bigots like you. Frankly spoken, the older guy’s are willing to “go back to the way things where”. Us younger guy’s? Most of us want every single feminist to be thrown in a prison cell+ restitution+ an Amendment to the Constitution expressly guaranteeing men gender equality(in short, even if every gal on the planet wanted to “go back” we would say “hell no!”) It doesn’t matter if you try to distance yourself from the word “feminism” and hide the fact that you are a “feminist”, because you will always out yourself as a female supremacist bigot! Rebecca Jane Stokes when are these people going to go away? Alex Cranz When we women shut up and sit down probably. How dare we talk and stuff and expect white dudes to do better. KW Or when discrimination against males in both academic education as well as in sports ends. When discrimination in employment, sign on bonuses and the legal system ends. When boy’s and young men no longer have to endure the “I hate men” chants from their overwhelmingly female fellow students(as well as other chauvinistic bigotry). I guess it is indeed much to ask to be treated like a human being. Lily I think most people just don’t fully understand what being a ‘feminist’ is about. Being a feminist is just being for equality and equal rights for women an men. In some countries girls still can’t go to school. Some people think being a feminist means you hate men and this couldn’t be further from the truth. Because there is this big taboo on announcing you are a feminist the real message seems to get lost. Definition of Feminism: The advocacy of women’s rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men. There is nothing in that definition that says anything negative. There shouldn’t be anything negative about stating you are a feminist because that simply means you are for equal rights. Pontifex I am sorry that you had to remove the word, but it seem to improved viewership. It is a good site. On the other hand, I took one look around the first page I saw (I arrived as a “Lost Girl” fan) and at the names of the articles, and the name of the site itself became very clear. I’ve found that when I describe myself as a “sexist male feminist” the resonse is “Your’e a feminist?” not “Youre a sexist?”. I am a straight man, and (therefore?) a scopophile and so I admit to that much. I’ve gone to see Kathy Bates nude;I’ve gone to see Bruce Willis nude. (What I got was five minutes of a 18 year old swimming Jane March. Nice, but Bruce chickened out.) I hope that an appreciation of female beauty is the extent of my sexism. After all, Irshad Manji is way hotter than Megan Fox. Parse that as you will. Unfortunately, it seems that the sometimes necessary hyperbole of early seventies feminism is all that people can associate the movement, not the immense social gains that are now being regularly stripped from us. Haven’t any of these men read Barbara Erehnreich’s “Stiffed”, on how Bush and Reagan screwed the working class male in America? Lilly This site is a good example for why I refuse to label myself as a feminist even though I am all in for equality…It is just this slightly aggressive tone, the arrogance towards others (If a woman does not label herself as a feminist, she must be either stupid or uneducated) and this complacent “I am right and everyone who has a different opinion is wrong”-attitude which is so common to most ideologies that define the world in terms of “US” versus “THEM”.