Just when I think I can’t love the Vampire Diaries anymore  without my heart’s vagina exploding, they rewrite history as we know it and bring back Klaus’s extensions of old, only this time – they are sun-kissed. BEHOLD THEIR SPLENDOR: Sorry. I’m back. I was off touching myself and thinking about the different products I [...]

To celebrate the return of everyone’s favorite mildly autistic forensic anthropologist, I invited Editor-In-Chief Alex Cranz to join me in a stream-of-consciousness-style-recap-as-we-go Adventure. What follows is that exchange. I want to say we won’t do this every week, but I can’t promise that – because as you will see, I am incredibly hard to ignore [...]

    Oh Snap, Ringer. You are a dirty, dirty, bitch of a show and I LOVE it. Almost enough to forgive you for making me wait two full weeks before giving me another installment of the soap opera that accidentally woke up and was a serious television drama and in now running with it [...]

I almost didn’t watch this week’s episode of the Vampire Diaries – blasphemy, I know! But let’s be real, this whole ‘ghosts are walking the earth because basically Bonnie is the worst witch ever,’ plot line begs for a return of stupid, homely, Aunt Jenna, arguably the least successful vampire of all time. Yeah, remember [...]

There are few things that show the age of a show more than the “let’s get the entire cast together for a frivolous pursuit and play it for laughs” episode. Nine out of ten shows do this with a softball/baseball episode. Way to run with the herd Grey’s Anatomy. Fortunately we’ve had nearly eight seasons [...]

I have to say that I am getting a little annoyed with the CW and their “previously on the Secret Circle” bit. They run the same thing over and over each week. I need new stimulation or I become a bored girl. Luckily we see a new blond hottie starting a fire in Nick’s back [...]

Why are fairy tales so enduring? Why can any child tell you a variation of the tale of Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty or Ali Baba? What makes them fairy tales and not simply really good stories? Why are they fairy tales and not simply old fantasy stories? Fairy tales are big and bold. The stories [...]

Aw. Meredith is a baby deliverer now. Way to use seven years of surgery studying Meredith. Also way to be that lady who loses her child and becomes obsessed with babies. You cliche you. Elsewhere Mark and Arizona have become best friends forever and are surrounding Callie. It’s not sexy and she kind of asked [...]

    Just when I think that the The Vampire Diaries has run out ways to tickle my pickle (overshare?) they go and make Elena train in the woods with Alaric a la a much scrawnier and ganglier Buffy – and then have Damon referentially call her out on it. I may have bolted up [...]

Oh snap, you guys. Ringer. Ringer. RINGER! (Are you picturing me yelling with my fists to the heavens a la this? No? WELL YOU SHOULD BE.) Gemma isn’t totally dead, it seems. Just missing. I know this because everyone was calling her phone. Everyone! Even Henry! Who we all believed had gone all crazy eyes [...]