Ringer
Humorous recaps of the CW show, Ringer, starring Sarah Michelle Gellar as IDENTICAL TWINS PEOPLE.
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Ringer: The One Where Catherine And Oliva Are Lesbians
9 Comments »Posted in RingerApr 11, 2012
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Remember how I started out recapping this show by being like “Well, it’s mildly ridiculous, but engaging,” and then how that turned into “This show is dumb and annoying.” and then how that turned into “Oh my god this show is ridiculous but I made a commitment to see it through so I guess [...]
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Ringer: The One Where Catherine Tries To Murder Herself, Siobhan.
2 Comments »Posted in RingerApr 4, 2012
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The last time I wrote about Ringer I thought six months had past, but either Siobhan is gestating the way in which an Elephant does, or I was somehow mistaken? Either way, Siobhan is still pregnant, so pregnant, all wearing tunics and what have you. So I guess this is a retraction? But really [...]
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Let’s Kill Bridget With Time Jumps and Strippers!
No comments yetPosted in RingerMar 28, 2012
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Man. You skip one episode of Ringer and apparently they decide to jump SIX MONTHS INTO THE FUTURE AND ALSO THERE ARE RUSSIAN MOBSTERS WHO COMMUNICATE AT A DRY CLEANERS LINING SUITS WITH MONEY AND PASSING OFF FOLDED TAROT CARDS. Okay. I’m back. Sorry, it’s just that everything on this show exploded in my absence. [...]
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Ringer: The One Where Andrew Gets Shot
1 Comment »Posted in RingerMar 14, 2012
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What’s that you say? You haven’t seen the episode yet and you are pissed at me for spoiling in my headline? Well tough titties, I am pissed at Ringer for its extreme highs and lows in entertainment and quality. As I write this, I am on hold with United Airlines. I have been on hold [...]
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Ringer: Machado’s Heart Is Revealed, Siobhan Clutches At Straws, And Someone Is A Murderer
2 Comments »Posted in RingerMar 7, 2012
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Somewhere in Russia, Juliet is on a train. Out of the corner of her eye, across the compartment, she spies her mother, resplendent in furs so blue they give off an air as arctic as the one they were designed to banish. She suppresses and shiver and contemplates the barren landscape unrolling in an [...]
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Ringer: PS – You’re An Idiot or The One Where Revelations Abound
No comments yetPosted in RingerFeb 29, 2012
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At some point, when none of us were watching, Bridget Kelly grew a conscience. Maybe when it was when she claimed her imaginary fetus died, maybe it was when she fucked her sister’s husband for the first time, maybe it was when I was in the kitchen digging the last olive from an old [...]
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Ringer: Bridget Decides To Give Up Being a Total Sociopath
No comments yetPosted in RingerFeb 22, 2012
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At the end of last week’s episode of Ringer, we were baited in a major way. There was Bridget! Badly beaten! Meeting Siobhan! At a graveside! “The TRUTH-” the CW’s predatory announcer “Would be revealed!” I widened my eyes in delight – we’re wrapping up the first season of this train wreck early? I support [...]
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Ringer: Zoey Deutch’s Scheme Revealed, Siobhan Spends Most Of Her Day Trapped In A Closet, R Kelly-Style
No comments yetPosted in RingerFeb 15, 2012
Read more »Okay gang, it’s Wednesday. It’s the middle of the afternoon. I’m all a-bloat with a giant chocolate chip cookie and a full fat latte. I just received a new order of pearls to pass around so we might all clutch at them. It’s time to talk about last night’s episode of Ringer. I know. I [...]
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Ringer is Rife With Rape Accusations, Bad Mothers, and Mysterious Parisian Liasons!
2 Comments »Posted in RingerFeb 8, 2012
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The best part of watching last night’s episode of Ringer? My roommate. She tends to leave me to my solitude when I do most of my viewing as she believes the shows I watch to be “garbage”. She is not always wrong. But for whatever reason, she got mildly hooked by Ringer (of all things!) [...]
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Ringer Is Back And Stupider Than Ever
4 Comments »Posted in RingerFeb 1, 2012
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Last night at about nine thirty, an alarm went off on my phone. I didn’t hear it for a while because I was in a bar and it was loud and some guy was fighting with his lady and I was vociferously debating the veracity of dark beer containing valuable nutrients but eventually I was [...]

















