You guys, The Vampire Diaries hasn’t been on television in roughly a million years. In an ironic twist of fate, I became so fearful that I was going to die of old age before the next episode aired, I contacted a witch, and enlisted her to invent vampirism thus assuring my immortality. Ain’t I a [...]

At the end of last week’s episode of Ringer, we were baited in a major way. There was Bridget! Badly beaten! Meeting Siobhan! At a graveside! “The TRUTH-” the CW’s predatory announcer “Would be revealed!” I widened my eyes in delight – we’re wrapping up the first season of this train wreck early? I support [...]

“Oh hey, oh hi everyone! I am television show on a major network in the United States of American, how are you? Me? Oh, LOL, I am O.K. I had a brownie for breakfast and also I am going to prominently feature a storyline about women being sexually exploited in the workplace – you know, [...]

The sun is falling on Mystic Falls, Virginia. It is twilight. Somewhere, Robert Pattinson is climbing a tree, looking not unlike a tubercular Dickensian chimney sweep, displaced to live among the chimps, like Tarzan before.  From high amid its branches, he cracks open a can of condensed milk and begins to lap at it like [...]

The best part of watching last night’s episode of Ringer? My roommate. She tends to leave me to my solitude when I do most of my viewing as she believes the shows I watch to be “garbage”. She is not always wrong. But for whatever reason, she got mildly hooked by Ringer (of all things!) [...]

The past couple of weeks I had to watch a lot of shows that have felt like work. It is with absolutely no irony that I say SWEET LORD THE VAMPIRE DIARIES WAY TO KICK SHIT UP A NOTCH AND REMIND ME WHY I LIKE TELEVISION. (Or, you know, SLTVDWTKSUANARMWILT – like how the kids [...]

When our plucky chief Alex was all “Becca, would you please check out Alcatraz and see maybe if you want to recap it?” I sighed heavily and said, “FINE.” But I mean,  not because I was annoyed or anything. It was mainly because I am a rebel and thus, do not cotton to authority or [...]

*************THERE IS A HUGE MASSIVE UGLY SPOILER IN THIS ARTICLE AND REALLY YOU SHOULD JUST GO WATCH THE SHOW IF YOU HAVEN’T******************************************* American Horror Story has successfully wormed its way into my heart using an effective mixture of insightful casting, strategic plotting, and Jessica Lange. In addition to providing fertile ground for intelligent debate,  fresh [...]

    Last night I realized that Ringer was making me an alcoholic.* I got home with a jug of moonshine (I regularly purchase this fiendish, transparent brew from Eustace Lurch, the would-be alchemist and actual-be weirdo who lives on my block and uses a walker for no reason.) under each arm to find all [...]

I’m sad to report that our editor refused to join me for this week’s episode of Bones but mainly because I totally forgot to ask to her to join me. I’m NOT sad to report that this week’s episode was a bizarre fusion of all the good, the bad, and the ugly that everyone’s favorite [...]